Part 3. Catatan Diari Seorang Gadis Biasa-Biasa

17 May 2015. Kuala Lumpur. 7.15 am. 

Telah beberapa hari ini, hati cuba menafikan, fikiran cuba dilayangkan jauh dari fokus sebenar. 

Fasa yang cukup sukar, jenuh menidakkan akhirnya hati ini tumpas.

Kerinduan yang tiada penghujungnya.

Hannah keliru. Namun jauh disudut hatinya, dia masih megharapkan perhubungan ini berakhir dengan cerita cinta yang bahagia.

Apakah sejarah mungkin berulang? Perhubungan jarak jauh yang dahulunya digelar lebih ‘mentah’ berbanding sekarang tentunya banyak memberi pengajaran.

Namun hati lelaki, siapa tahu bilamana ianya berubah jika di’sogokkan’ dengan empat perkara utama – harta, pangkat, wanita dan kuasa.

Apa yang boleh dijangka, semua mungkin bakal berubah, keakraban, kemesraan dan mungkin juga kesetiaan. 

Hannah hanya berharap 5 tahun ini tidak berlalu pergi begitu saja. Kerana lukanya nanti terlalu perit hingga tidak akan lagi dapat diubati. 

Mungkin masa dan ruanglah yang diperlukan tika ini untuk Hannah. Ambillah selama mana dan seluas mana ruang yang diperlukan, apa yang akan terjadi di antara masa dan ruang ini nanti anggaplah ianya sebagai takdir. 

...

Nukilan, 

Ceya.

Part 2. Catatan Diari Seorang Gadis Biasa-Biasa.

April 2015. Kuala Lumpur. 

Tiada daya yang berbaki untuk kutahan air mata ini. 
Bak kata orang melaka, hujan lebat nau sampai banjir.
Di pejabat hari ini, aku menerima guruh dan kilat sambung menyambung. 
Mungkin mereka lupa aku hanya gadis biasa-biasa berusia 24 tahun. 
Masih terlalu, atau agak 'muda' untuk dunia seperti kamu.
Zalim benar kamu semua. Keluh Hannah malam itu.

Bukan mudah menjadi seorang dewasa. Sungguh.
Pelbagai liku perlu dilalui oleh Hannah, bahkan pastinya fasa yang sama dilalui jutaan dewasa yang lain. 

Laluan hidup setiap insan tidak sama, curamnya juga berbeza. 
Laluan yang ingin ditempuhi mungkin jauh menyimpang daripada langkahan kaki ini. 

Usai maghrib, panggilan dari si dia ku terima. 
Segala kekuatan cuba dipindahkan agar aku terus kuat, setidaknya untuk bekalan malam itu. 
Kekuatan itu diserap perlahan-perlahan dan Hannah tidur lena malam itu.

Namun, liku ini tidak terus terhenti malah masih menghantui. Masih perlu dilalui dan dihadapi. Hannah masih mencuba dan berdoa agar terus diberi kekuatan luar biasa oleh Yang Esa dalam setiap langkahnya.

...

Nukilan,
Ceya.

Cerpen. Part 1- catatan diari seorang gadis biasa-biasa

Part 1.

September 2013. Kuala Lumpur. 7 pagi.

Empat tahun berlalu. Belum begitu stabil, seperti ombak datang membadai. Perubahan angin dan frekuensinya sering membuatkan aku tidak berasa selamat. 

Apa benar semua lelaki adalah serupa dan mempunyai nilai yang sama? Aku mengharapkan lelaki yang aku kenali empat tahun lepas masih berada di depan ku, masih jitu tanpa apa-apa corekkan. Kerana dengan nilai itulah, aku jatuh ke dunia cinta. Aku anggap kau lelaki luar biasa, hampir sempurna untuk melengkapiku, kerana aku sendiri gadis biasa-biasa. 

Perbezaan antara kami mungkin makin ketara. Tapi perasaan emas yang aku rasai  ini masih sama, sama seperti empat, tiga, dua dan setahun lepas.  Bagaimana dengan apa yang dia rasa?
Kerana apa yang aku takuti, perkataan yang seringkali aku dengar dimana-mana 'manusia berubah'.

"Manusia mungkin berubah, tapi harapnya, hati tidak", keluh Hannah.

Hannah membuka satu demi satu kad-kad kecil pemberian kekasih hatinya sejak awal perkenalan dahulu. "It's been a while since this one," Bisik Hannah sambil memegang kad terakhir yang terimanya sejak dua tahun lepas. Isi ucapan dan ungkapan dalam setiap kad, begitu ikhlas dan penuh kasih sayang , Hannah dapat rasakannya.

...

Nukilan,
Ceya.

P/S - waa..berjaya tulis empat para sey, amazed dgn dri sendiri.hahaha.sila sambung kerja-kerja hakiki anda sekarang ceya.

just...

hallluuuu...assalamualaikum!

It's great to be here again.
I mean, ya here, Kuala Lumpur.

I had my medical check up this morning, and alhamdulilah,
Doctor said, everything is okay, normal and awesome! I love love love it!
In fact, I am very grateful.
First, because nikmat sihat is something that I treasure the most.
Secondly, of course because, I had bad experience before, 
emmm not really bad, but ...what the best word to put in ya,,,
as it happened because of reasons and hikmah. Alhamdulillah.
Thirdly, after a week, I managed to gain weight,
another one kilo as after lost two kilos in one week that day.

As usual, my journey begins...
Travel by public transport, especially by the train,
and tell you what? this time, even I have to take 3 different lanes of train,
I am not took wrong train again! (ya, at least for today :D)
Ya so proud of you ceya! 
not a wrong train, but a wrong clinic!
ceya, clumsy as always :D

Feeling sleepy now...
let's have some beauty sleep first,
will write more soon!
Selamat malam! ;)

p/s - nervous + rindu.

Mr. March is wonderful month.

Wow it is Mr.March!

Alhamdulillah. Alhamdulillah. Alhamdulillah.

And I have three wedding invitations, one on 17th, my officemate - Kak Ayuni...
and another two on 24th, my classmate - Kak Ella and...my school bestie, Manja!

So far, within these 10 days, Mr March has been so nice to me. 
Lot of meaningful things happened.

Chances, rezeki and loves from Allah and people surrounding were a blast for me.

I went to Kuala Lumpur, alone, (after more less 5 months) to complete two missions
which were very unexpected and I should say Allah plans it for me, Alhamdulillah.
And I managed to see my friends in UKM which in great of help, eyusaaaa and friends :)

And, and I met my dearest sister, Kak Yanaaaaaa! <3

Oh cop, there were four missions altogether then. I see....:o

Even so, it was not an easy journey for me. 
Some struggles, perseverance and my spirit make it happened to go through it.
And of course, du'a and support from beloved friends too.
which includes Kak Nuzurrrr ;)

And I fall sick after few months given by Allah nikmat sihat. 
At last, after 3 days of feeling that weak, I surrendered myself to a nice friendly doctor and ya, ya, lots of pills were given to consume. After a week, Alhamdulillah, even not fully recover, I am feeling good today.

Why do I hate to see a doctor or to admit that I am sick?
Because I know I am strong enough to fight these bacteria and just be as strong as I can.
Sometimes, no matter how hard you tried, its just not your lawan.

But still, last week, I had a fast and simple date with my bestfriend, Lala!
We watched movie in our favourite place, and tell you what, we watched our favourite genre of movie - Jack the GIANT slayer! This movie was, oh, are awesome! as, errrr..emmm...I would like to watch it again!!!

As mediacommer, I am thinking of writing an analysis or a quick review on this movie.
Later on perhaps. Btw, I am fallen in love with Elmont, sorry Jack! :P

And this coming weeks of the month, 
there will be a few twists in my life,
few steps ahead which I need pair of new shoes to step on this journey confidently and safely. 

What that will be?
Ask Mr March then! 
See ya! ;)


p/s - keep praying for the days and for Lahad Datu. amin.
And thank you to you too for your endless support Dato'! <3

kadang-kadang 

seperti putus harapan.

kadang-kadang

seperti berkobar-kobar.

Ombak datang memukul lagi.

Nah, putus asa hampir sahaja perkataannya.

Kadang-kadang

ya, mungkin

diri ini tidak cukup bagus untuk itu.

Akur pada tanggapan sendiri

dan berhenti untuk terus mencuba?

Oh oh oh,

mungkin belum masanya.

p/s  - he is back for weekend. have to meet him for a while. :)

[HD] AJL27 Aizat - Terukir Di Bintang (Anugerah Juara Lagu ke-27 2013)

:::  the song, the singer, the melody is just perfecto. Awesome!
 So calming, sweet and romantic. :::
CONGRATS!

p/s - the moment Aizat sepetkan his eyes, looking straight to the camera with the mug hi, makes my heart smiling all the way.  Did you sing for me? :D

ya, ;( again.

hey Mr. X,
you are right,
and at last,
I am hurt.

p/s - hope you are doing good.

Muharam datang lagi.

"Sesungguhnya Allah tidak melihat di mana ia bermula, tapi ia dilihat pada penghujungnya"

I read and quote it from newspaper just now, and its something that we should ponder about.
So unlike human being, they judge people from their past.
That's the fact, Allah will always be the Greatest. AllahhuAkhbar!


p/s - Ketibaan Muharam harus dijadikan permulaan untuk penghujung yang lebih baik. InsyaAllah.

tired vs sad.

when people saw you and say,

"You look tired dear"

and you will just smile, half smile.

dear people,

how I wish you to know that,

I am not really tired, but

deep in, here -> my heart,

little bit sad, unhappy, that's all.

p/s - my brain, heart and legs are tired. any good isotonic to drink up? :)

the feeling.

While having a cup of tea, a girl come to me and presents a conflict.

this feeling is hard to describe.
is this what people called as love?
while typing the above statement, I am still confusing and blurrr.

wake up dear little girl.
first, for the very beginning of stage 1, yes you feel nothing and everything seems to be fine, and will be fine as well.
he came and you both be friends. shared and talked a lot of things which you don't even realise that 'magical feel' spreading through your own heart.

Stage 2, he told you how he feels. At this stage, everything he does seems sweet and close to your heart. You just like this feeling and most importantly, you feel comfortable with it, with him even though your heart are not ready for the next critical stages. So, you did tell him to not put any high hope on this relationship.

Stage 3, you start to think of him, contacting every each day, reporting things of your life, even receiving and downloading reports from him as well. And this happened automatically, without any pressure from anyone or anything! This moment, you are too occupied and being careless. You don't even realise, you are actually giving such hopes to him and ya, you forgot to ever mention that, "please, don't put a hope", again.

Stage 4. He asked you, "how now?". He is getting more serious and perhaps wants a label for this relationship. You just can't figure out how you felt, even you feel now. And you decide not to hurt him. Yes, you don't want to hurt him, [which, unconciously, you are actually did dear little girl], so you decide to come clean again. He then back off one step and decided not to be close as before anymore.

Stage 5. He and you, both stalking each other, wondering how he/she is doing?, is he took his meal?, is she okay? They still contacting each other, like once a week. The fact is, they are care each other. On your big day, that night, he told you that he miss you and how he really wants to go and see you that day but could not. And ya, actually you are missing him too, you were looked around where he is could be to be found that day, but you just don't tell him.

Stage 6. He made it. He touched your heart. However, you still with your same answer, as you still clueless about how you feel because, your heart like in mixer bowl. You just too afraid to take a risk as once you declare it, you know how powerful the word is, so you don't wish to misue it in a state that you, yourself are confuse. You told him that you are not good enough and suits for him. You just can't explain why but just hoping that he will understand it by himself? And...he hurts, again. He just don't want to receive any form of communication from you anymore, as that will be just add on, top up on his wound. Now you know, now you realise because of the 'hope' you accidently gave, is what hurts him.

Stage 7. You read the last email of you-him. You feel hurt, deep inside your heart. What you know, your heart hurts when you know you hurt him. And how you wish he knows that it is not your intention at all. No more explanation, as no matter what, it's just won't change anything.

Stage 8. No, I will use 'Next stage', which only God knows how the stage will be or if is there any stages more after this. But at this stage, you always pray for him that he will find his happiness soon, very soon even before you find yours.

somehow, more likely, there is something like to be a barrier. A barrier between you and him, an obstacle between you and him, a difference between you and him and an obvious line that differentiate between you and him, which why you both are impossible to be together.
Remember, "how you feel is just not enough for you become one and together" or "perasaan sahaja tak cukup untuk dua orang bersama dan bercinta".

# and now, she is merindu. I mean, if, she is always thinking of him, do things and suddenly the things related are reminding of him, keep listening his songs and sometimes hoping to hear from him, that is rindu right? Yet she is still clueless and rationally, sit quietly in her own world.

p/s - I had my last sip right after heard the little girl's 'presentation' and my mind flies on something. What am I thinking? Emmm...will present it here later then! :D

quick one.

Wow. The new look of blogspot was really make me awkward.
By the way, first time, of everything, it is normal though.

Lots had happened.
Done my degree studies, waiting for convocation day, still looking for a related or promising job, working as well as get to know more people, mingle with kinds of people, and now I have a new group of friends, supporting one. Even our friendship still new.

Another story,
I am so happy to be at home.
My family is my everything now.
We are facing some problems and I know,
they need me, and I need them.
We should stick together to go through this. We would.

And now, I'm hurt. Deeply.
Wonder how it goes.
Allah knows better.
Hoping for the best. InsyaAllah..

p/s - as usual, it's quite implicit, people who understands me, will get to see it.

-DONE- UNDONE -

Hey.
 I'm just back from my very last examination paper in UKM for these three years.

Alhamdulillah is always the best word, for now.

The paper called as 'Industri Komunikasi, Dasar dan Undang-Undang'.

Fuhhh, sounds so susah isn't?

Well for you it  might not, but for me,  
its like three heavy rocks on my chest

 especially when I'm reading the notes.

First, I am not so into these dasar, 
and my general knowledge is quite limited. 

Second, I've been reading the notes for the past two weeks and
 I've go through the notes like about 7-8 times?

Third, I felt the 'dup dap dup dap'  two hours before the examination starts.
 I can't concentrate, I can't 'smile' and I can't stop from worrying. 

But, alhamdulillah. It turns out well, I mean I can anwers it quite well and just hoping for a good result or to be specific, an A. Its a different story for the  subject - 'Rencana Siaran dan Dokumentari'. The questions is too many and the total marks are 100%. Are you kidding me sir? Its two hour's paper. I don't feel like to comment this subject. Not so good I should say. :(

But now, get ready to settle up my thesis. 

Another 20% to go and...ya,bubye to UKM then ~

p/s - thank you to dato' for helping me with those 'dasar' and you know what, it turns out well just now. You know I need you right? xoxo ;)

Start working hard, smartly syeera! :)

Once upon a time, 

its actually early in the morning...

A girl tries, very hard to start her new day with a smile...

as she has a very important mission tomorrow..

so, by now...she should revise all her notes...

then...

stop it now syeera! get working!

All right. 

She is now with her notes.

That's all. 

The  End :)))

p/s : memang merepek-repek je nih.hahaha

that's how it ends.just be grateful ceya!

Oh, the last class had ended yesterday.

I cried. I cried terribly until the late evening.

I tried my hard not to cry in front of others, all time, 

since my school days. not even front of my parents.

But I shed buckets of tears yesterday.

Yes of course, one of the reason is the 'perpisahan' between us (the class member).

Eyusaaa made a video specially dedicated to the class, 

but again I am not crying because the video that time,

as I am the first person to watch it two days before the preview day.

But I started crying when the video is showing, 

because my tears are more on what happened between us as a class.

Lots had happened. It's five semesters, almost 3 years memories.

Some of you, we are close at first, but at the end we seems like are not.

Some of you, pretend to be close with me, but talk bad about me behind.

Some of you, I  feel dekat and the love, tapi sayang dah nak habis semester.

Some of you, I feel so hard to berpisah with, but this is how a pertemuan ends.

When we are attracted, we start to repel each other. May I know why?

Did I do something bad? Did I ever said something hurts you? 

do something bleeds your heart?

Then,  you guys? 

never hurt me? never do or say anything bleeds me? 

The fact is, I am nothing and nobody. 

I have no bling-bling features like you guys do. 

I have quite dark skin, I am so skinny,

having a short-sightedness, not so bubbly,

 not so friendly until you start it,

not a caring showing person, I can't drive guys! 

I don't even marry a  Dato' or any Tan Sri,

 I am just lead a simple and moderate life, 

I am not a comel-comel type and 

I am not so creative like you guys do, 

I lack of confidence and many more. 

So why we can't be friends?

 Is it because of those weaknesses I have?

I tried my best to be as matured as I can.
 I am just 19 years old when we were first year, 

by mingle with almost 'matured' course mates, 

I have to be a women not a girl anymore. 

I always believe that 'big strong girl don't cry'.

So, I have try to handle my feelings, attitude and many more 

just to show that I can tolerate with you guys.

Sometimes,

 I have to pretend and  forced 

my heart and brain to act like nothing happen and be sabar. 

I admit, I might do lots of mistakes that may hurt you guys,

so here is my apology, 

I am so so so sorry for what I have done to you guys, to every each of you.

You know I am not perfect, and for every single little thing that hurts you, 

which I might not realise,

 please forgive me :(

I can't say sorry face to face, as I might cry again.

Its time to go. I chose to run away from you guys.

I love broadcast journalism, will always love it.

but, cinta tak semestinya memiliki,

so, I guess the south will be the best place for me.

All the best for those in the industry lines,

I will always proud of you guys. :)

I am just a very simple girl. 

All I need is just sincerity and purity in our friendship. 
No politics please?

I love you guys. seriously. Everyone of you. 

Btw, pardon my english and grammar.I'm tried. :)

Salam perpisahan.

p/s - Thank you awak, for taking me away last evening, I even cried few times in the car. Thank you too by taking me to the clinic last night. You know I need you right?

 love love love you awak! ;)

Back to the track, of blogspot. ^^

Fuhhh...fuhh...Wow..

it's been a long long time since the last post published.

Lots of things happened this semester 

and hey, you know what? 

This is actually the last week of 'kuliah week',

before the 'study week' and of course the 'examination week'.

I should say, how time flies right?

Well, as this is the last semester before I am going to 'latihan industri', 

so am kind of busy with commitments, responsibilities, 

duties, assignments (of course) and many more!

So here are some recaps on what am I doing  for this semester, 

well, read it if you want, as this post is just like a diary for me. 

and if you don't, then lets skip to other post.hehe

There are 14 weeks all together in a semester.

So, lets make it in a nice chronology.

Week 1.

I am staying in a new college. Kolej Tun Hussein Onn.

Well ya, not so new, 

but still considered as new, (belit-belit tak?haha)

as with the new 'akak-akak office', 

'new' friends, 'new' cafe and 'new' roomate.

Well, everything is not so new. 

As if my heart is been so close to this college before, perhaps.

My new roomate is not a stranger. I got to know her before.

But now, we might not so close, 

but sometimes we do share lots of thing together. 

Later, I will explain more about her ;)

Week 2. 

Emmm....can I do the details tommorow?

Promise! I have to do something important right now.

I will share my experience as Controller of Radio MIDAS, my group won the PSA's contest organised by Primework Studios, had a wonderful tiring shooting in a scary mysterious house, mystery of a cat in my room,  browny as a birthday give, a surprise birthday ice cream from coursemates, outing with 19 people till 5 in the morning,

 a ask to get engage and more stories.

So, which part are you eager to read about?hehe

See you soon bloggers. 
(konon ramai peminat ke makcik!.haha)

p/s - this is just about myself, things around me and I do appreciate  it. 

Alhamdulillah :)

Stand with your HEART!

"Why should I be quiet? You are saying, if they are doing something that is wrong to MY COUNTRY, and I should not say anything?"

I'm quoting Tun Dr Mahathir's words. 

These saying, not just reflects to one COUNTRY,

but also can be apply in our daily life, oh it's actually my life. 

Fight for your right. Stand with your heart.

That's how I'm comforting myself, hopefully it works.

Motip sangat pic ni kan? :P

p/s - go ceya go!

AsSalam. Hallu!!! Its been a long while since I wrote the last entry. 

Emmm...let's straight to the point. (not in mood to write berjela-jela,

 just wanna share something this morning.)

:::::::::

:::::::::::::::::::::::::

Seseorang yang soleh pernah berkata kepada anaknya, 

"Janganlah anda menjadi kepala (pemimpin), sebab kepala banyak menahan rasa nyeri."

Maksud dan ucapan orang soleh itu ialah bahawa jangan terlalu senang untuk menonjolkan diri dan ingin menjadi pemimpin kerana kritikan dan umpatan. pelecehan dan serangan itu sasaranya tidak lain hanyalah terhadap orang-orang yang berada di barisan hadapan.

source : siri penyejuk hati

:::::::::::::::::::::::::

::::::::::

Well, it's  sounds hard, but that's how responsibility is. Only the chosen one will know the rasa 'nyeri'. Anyway, everybody is the 'pemimpin' kan? 'Pemimpin' in a society, in a class, in a family or even in ourselves. All the best then! 

p/s : Hoping to have more strength and more smile :)

Hi Facebookers ;)

Hallu. What a calming evening anyway.

And...

Something happened when I have nothing to do,

okay okay okay, 

actually I have lots of thing to do, 

examination week is coming,

read out the notes, memorize the terms, bla...bla...bla..

but you know, those things, sometimes I need a break.

(not really sometimes, almost everytime.hihihi)

So, this is what actually happened,

Its like a riddle,
a question on whose eyes is that,

then as I am so well familiar with those eyes,

without any hesitation, 
and confidently I type his name,

it's FIZOW OMAR's eyes. the actor?you know?

Well, thanks to my ma, as she is really kind of fonded on this guy,

and might want to be her menantu kot.haha
Okay, that's too much syeera! (ya I know. :P )

She used to keep talking about him, so thats how I know him.

Well then, 
as I am the first and the fastest to answer with the correct one,

this is my reward,

Haha. It's just for fun anyway. 

And the other reward is,

suddenly lots of Facebookers,

or I should say, the members of the group are 

adding me to be their friends on the list,

but I need time to, either approve it or not, as,

you guys are strangers to me. Sorry.

Anyway, the page,

Lelaki Kacak, perempuan Cantik,

my friend entered the competition, 

and she asked me to click 'like' on her photo,

but you know, to like the photo, I have to like the page first,

and that's how I am in this group.

After supporting my friend,
I did not leave the group as

 I think it will be fun doing those riddles when I'm free kan? :)

p/s : can't wait to go home.ok tu je.huhu

in a ROME..eh, in a room :)

hallu.goodm0rning.

nah, this entry will be..

emmm like a token for a good friend, 

or a 'kakak'

for sharing a nice,warming room during this short semester. 

oh, it should be a room mate then!

In a better word, an appreciation may be? :D

Here is the story.

Once upon a time, I met a girl. the comel one.hihi.

And she is actually two years and four months older than me, 

(so, now, see, how young I am.hahaha)

So I prefer to call her as 'kak' Nuzur. 

She has a nice name, and I love to call her name, her full name. 

NUZURUL HUDAAAAA! 

that's how sometimes I teriak her name 

when she's done 'something' to me or surroundings, 

I mean, especially when..errr she bullied me!

We seem like had gone through quite lots of things together  in the last two semesters,

 I mean three semesters including this one (short semester). 

Ya, lots of things, 
that event, these incident, those moment, 
the cry things, the smile things, the secrets, 
the worrying, the gossips even I, myself not perfect
(anyway, sapa yang tak pernah gossiping, tell me.hahaha), 
we were argued, we do fight sometimes (eh ye ke? ye kot.hihi),
 we do have misunderstandings, 
we do have things that not satisfied each other, 
we do hurt each others' feelings 

but we are still friends! (tak gitu? :P )

So now, back to the topic, in a room. 

Well, we know, like my previous entry which 
there are always stories behind, in a room. 

At first, there are some complications in order to get a room, 

(she and I know what and how was it),

 but Alhamdulillah 

we got the nearest college to the faculty, (don't be jelous :P )

Okay, let me explain, 

it is a short semester, which it's only about 8 weeks.

So, lots of my stuff were in the store room, 

therefore we are sharing things. What are they?

eh. this one is not the things. these were our juadah berbuka puasa.

her kettle. with this, mi maggie sokmo la jawabnya.hahaha

her hangers. I have my own hangers, but mostly in the store room.

her pail. I do have mine,
the big one in the store, the small one in the room.

her sister's toto.
Double toto. comelll :D

Oh this one I like the most. Her toaster.
ROTI BAKARRRRR, nuymmmy!

Her....eh, excuse me, this is mine ok.hehehe

So, lastly, I would like to say, emm thank you to this 'kakak' for lenting me lots of things as, upon my difficulities (my far home town, things in the store.waaa sedih...bla-bla-bla). Thank you very much. :) 
Oh ya..a bunch of thanks to Maria too, she is a sweet girl kan! 
(yeay dapat kawan baru dari kedah ;) )
And...I would like to apologize on my mistakes, 
misbehavior  miscommunication, weaknesses and lots more that might hurts you. SORRY :(  

Anyway, 

tell you a secret, 

when she is going back to her sister's house or to her hometown,

 this is what she always pesan to me,

 " jangan lupa makan tau.makan tau." haha. 

Don't you and she know that I am dieting :P :P :P

p/s : Well, you know, I am not kind of touching-touching person and good with ayat berbunga-bunga in writings, ya as usual, but I am trying okayyy ;)